Thursday, September 26, 2013

It's Not Summer WIthout You

1 degree (Celsius... 34 Fahrenheit)

That was the temperature when I woke up this morning.

Almost in disbelief, I went outside in jeans and my summer coat (that's a funny thing, before I came to Norway.  I had three coats.  One I wore in fall, one I wore when it was winter, and another I wore in both months when I was wearing something sorta fancy... Now, I have eight coats) and was quickly re-buffed.

It was, indeed, cold outside.

(I realize "cold" is relative, but, when you're anticipating low-teens Celsius/mid-50s Fahrenheit, getting smacked in the mouth with something quite lower than that registers as cold)

Autumn is leaving its mellowness behind for its spiky, rotted stage.  Don't remember summer even saying goodbye.

Fortunately for me, I had (at the behest of the lady) swapped out my summer clothes.

The week prior, I had carried up the winter clothes, in their dormant boxes tucked away in the back of the unit in the basement, to the apartment.  Then, solemnly, I folded and sorted which summery things I still dreamed of wearing between now and when the sun's warmth returned from those which I could go without (this seasonal change is the saddest I feel for inanimate objects... Sorry, threadless.com t-shirt. I just don't have space for you.  I don't like you any less... It just won't be that warm and... you'll understand when you're older?).  The unchosen were placed in the spot formerly reserved for the winter clothes, which, in turn, replaced the summery clothes spots in my drawers and closet, and then, I returned the boxes to their sub-terrain storage.

So, I'm not cold today.  Bring it on fall/winter.

ALT FOR NORGE


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Thursday, September 19, 2013

Norway, Scotland... Scotland, Norway

HAPPY 50th POST, OSLOst in SPACE!!!!!

Party time!!



Uhmm... Anyway, I apologize for my absence last week, but it was for a good reason.

I forgot.

But it's not like I forgot because I was watching an episode of "Boardwalk Empire", I forgot because I was getting ready to go to Scotland.

So yeah, I went to the northern part of the UK.  It was not an easy trip.  1 hour to Stavanger.  Switch flights.  2 hours to Aberdeen.  But it was pretty neat.

And it went like this:

We landed in the Aberdeen International Airport and, to my surprise, the Stavanger to Aberdeen flight had two people on it that were non-EU/EEA citizens.  Me and some other schmuck.  The reason I know this is that, upon entering into the airport and customs, there were two, distinct lines.  One for the EEA people and one for us "others".  

It was like landing in Dulles or JFK and smiling at all the doe-eyed, europeans as I breezed through my line to the front.

Simple problem.  I had to fill out a Landing Card.

Half the information, all the tediousness
As further testament to the irregularity that non-EU/EEA people (I'm tired of writing that, but it's an important distinction to make... If I were Albanian, I'd be in the same boat... well, no, that would probably be a much worse, and probably leaky boat because it's Albania... Jokes!  Calm down, readers in Tirana) make said flight, not a single stewardess had asked me if I needed a card nor were they readily available on the aircraft.  

No matter.  I had to fill it out (not like I had to get in the back of the line... I was the line) and then was on my way.  But not without this stamp:

Do not give him any money... But, like, we're not endorsing slavery.  You know, just don't let him preform any type of labor to be safe
UK wanted to make sure, under no circumstances, would anyone give me money.  My trip was to be a purely, one-sided fiscal relationship.  Which is strangely how I'd characterize my romantic relationships in my early to mid-20s.

So.

I'm in Aberdeen now.

Apparently, business takes of here
There's power and wealth and then there's the kind of power and wealth when you're on the money used in your own country.  Not sure what's going on with my hair here 
I'm an idiot because the funniest thing about the area where this picture was taken is that there were a dozen Scottish Flags (St. Andrew's Cross), one EU flag, and one Union Jack... They love England!
 Eventually, we left the airport.

To do so, we hired a driver that we shared with another couple also going to our destination.  As he was driving a sedan, there was only space for three in the back seat and I was left to get in the front.  As I moved to the front of the car, I noticed our driver opened the right, front door.  In my head I was thinking, What a cheeky lad (because I put on airs when I'm in Scotland, apparently), he's angling for a fat, nice tip he is.  As I attempted to get in, he stopped me and gave me a really funny look.

"Fixin' to drive, are ya, lad?"  He asked in a thick, Scottish accent (that probably goes without mentioning)

Taken aback, I looked in the car and saw that the steering wheel was, in fact, on the right hand side of the car.  Laughing, I went over and got in on the other side.  As I did so, I looked around and, it seemed, every other car was like this, too.  

Now, I realize that the UK and other British subsidiaries drive on the left-hand side of the road and their steering wheels are on the right-hand side of the car, but I just didn't really think about it until I saw it.  Also, even if you know you're going to see it.  It's still very disorienting.  I spent most of the trip in wonderment about the location of the steering wheel and the cars on the street (especially on two lane roads, when cars were whizzing by our right hand side, in the opposite direction, and in traffic circles/round-a-bouts).
I kept trying to step on the gas/break throughout the trip, too.  It really felt like I was supposed to be driving!
As for the rest of it, I was blown away by the number of rugby fields/pitches (there were a lot) and how they outnumbered soccer/football fields/pitches.  Also, I was surprised by the handful of field hockey fields/pitches and how, in the three days of our trip, we only saw boys playing it.  

The landscape was beautiful (especially the coast along the North Sea) and the countless, rolling hills and glens reminded me of Western Maryland/VA/Shenandoah Valley region of Maryland.  The big difference being that there were churches and castles that were hundreds of years older than the United States all over the place.


Sure, it was mostly windy and grey skies (I, jokingly, told a friend from England that the UK was "as green-grey blobby as I expected"), but it was fitting.  I imagine the place must've been divine in Fall when all the foliage was turning colors and the grey/gloom, with streaks of sun, would be more fitting.  

It was a touch warmer than Norway (and a whopping bit cheaper!), but that goes for most of the earth.  

I had fun (minus the 10 hours it took to get back to back to Oslo on Sunday) and would definitely consider living there.  Though, I think that has more to do with my fondness for Anglophone countries (It's such an awesome feeling when everything happening around you is in your native tongue), lower cost of living, and good whisky than any decided advantages over Norway.

But, for now I'm in Norway and I'm glad...

ALT FOR NORGE

Fine, jerks... Here's the pictures of me wearing a kilt

Tough guy picture

Playful picture
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Thursday, September 5, 2013

The Cost of Living the High Life


Norway is a pretty wealthy nation.

Based on last year's end-of-year numbers, it ranks in the top 5, globally, in both Purchasing Power Parity and Nominal GDP (both rankings are in terms of "per capita", an important distinction to make.  In terms of "gross", Norway doesn't rank in the top 20).  The abundance of riches are not just limited to monetary units, as Norway is rated as the global leader in human development (a seemingly unquantifiable thing to measure, but the process the UNDP uses is addressed, at length, via the link I've provided).

Not only does Norway create a conducive situation for their own citizens, they extend a helping hand to developing nations around the world as the globe's second-largest foreign aid contributor, in terms of percentage of GDP.  Also, while the number is in decline, Norway is the world's, 13th largest recipient of asylum seekers.

What does this mean in day-to-day life?

Norway is second-globally in wages and, while the citizens enjoy a plethora of upscale cars, multiple homes, and jet-setting vacations, Norway has one of the largest, maximum, personal income tax rates in the world.  If one were to read the Government's 2011 Tax Report such phrases that would be heresy in my native country are present, for example:  "redistribution of wealth", "fair tax system", and "plans to increase the pension income social security contribution" (there are a few, familiar phrases such as "90% of the equity is owned by 10%").
Puffy would probably not enjoy Norway
Taxes, like death, are unavoidable and profitable ($36 billion in Norway in 2010), but where the average person really feels the pinch is on the VAT.  Value Added Tax is basically a punishment for balling that only effects the buyer.  It isn't a godless, euro concept, it is present everywhere.  Even in America.  The US' version of VAT is the reason why gas and cigarette prices vary so much from state-to-state (well, partially the reason).  The main difference in how VAT is used in Europe (specifically in Scandinavia) on more products and with a higher rate of pay.

For food, there's a 15% rate and a variety of transportation, hotels, and entertainment come with a 8% rate.  While that seems hard to keep up with, it's nothing compared to alcohol.

A 12-pack of 12 oz (.355 liter) Sierra Nevada or Samuel Adams costs $14 on the east coast, but a six pack of half-liter (16.9 oz) Tuborg costs $25 in Norway.  There's a 25% VAT on alcohol + 5 kroner ($0.90) per can environmental VAT + 1 kroner pant ($0.17) per can.  Additionally, on wine, there's 4 kroners for every percent of alcohol (13% alcohol = 52 kroners/$8); on spirits, the cost rises to 6 kroners for every percent (40% alcohol = 240 kroners/$40).  This is before you factor in the soon to go into effect 5% increase in alcohol tax.

You have to pay the cost to be the boss.

ALT FOR NORGE



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